As the twins settled Alatariel back into bed in the healing room Elladan suggested they put more salve on her sunburned skin. Carefully they rubbed the ointment on her body. 'Is this supposed to be erotic?' she wondered. 'They are so kind and gentle. Why does their touch feel electrified?' The twins looked at each other and smiled. 'Did they just hear my thoughts?' she questioned in her own mind. They were interrupted as Elrond entered the room with some fresh water and more healing tea.
After setting the tray down he set about examining Alatariel. "You are looking much better," he said. "Make sure to keep the salve on and the burns will heal nicely," he said, glancing over to the twins as well.
"Thank you lord Elrond."
"Where is Cel?" he asked his sons in Elvish.
"She is on the porch with Legolas, Ada," Elrohir answered.
*~*~*~*~*~*
"Elrond will be looking for you. You need to rest, meldis," Legolas told Cel.
"I am worried about Haldir," she said, still watching him stare out over the sea. "Will he play that sad tune long?" she asked. The sounds of Haldir's flute echoed over the sands and up onto the porch of The First Homely House.
Not wanting to tell her that Haldir had been known to sit and stare at the sea for days, Legolas said, "He needs to be alone with his memories. He will cease to play the tune and come back to the house when he is ready."
Cel thought back, remembering that she had been told that Haldir had nearly faded upon losing Galádë. She was not buying any of Legolas' words to let Haldir work it out on his own. Cel devised a plan. "Would you mind getting me a glass of water please?" she asked Legolas.
"Gladly, meldis. I will be right back," he answered and went inside.
Cel quickly grabbed the blankets that were lying on the porch swing and walked towards the beach where Haldir sat. He stopped playing as he heard her approach but did not look up. She set one blanket down next to him and wrapped the other around Haldir's shoulders. "The breeze off the sea is getting cooler. I did not want you to be cold."
"I thank you for your kindness, but I do not feel the cold," he answered. "You need not worry about me, my lady."
"It is my nature. I cannot sit idly by while someone I care about is hurting," she explained, sitting down next to Haldir. "I would like to sit with you even in silence if that is what you wish."
"You are very kind but you should be inside resting. Elrond is looking for you," he stated.
"How can you know that?"
"We speak to each other over distance in our minds more often than you think. Perhaps you will develop these skills – it is not as difficult as it sounds, and I do not know a Peredhel who cannot." He stared blankly before him and then said, "Elrond really wants you to come inside and rest. And I would really like Elrond to get out of my head."
"I am resting here on this blanket. Am I not?" she smiled back at Haldir, hoping this would appease Elrond. Even if she wasn't trying to help Haldir, she had no desire to return to bed.
"Where is Alatariel?" Haldir asked with concern in his voice.
"She is with the twins. Should I be concerned?" she almost laughed.
He smiled at her. "Perhaps soon, but not yet." He looked over his shoulder to see Legolas hurry towards them. "I fear you have panicked him," he laughed. "I have not seen him move so quickly here in Valinor." Cel smiled to see Haldir laugh.
"Here is your water meleth-nin," Legolas said, sitting in between them.
"Thank you," she said taking a big drink. She tried not to sputter as she heard the word he used. She'd read enough fanfics to know it was Elvish, but she had trouble remembering the exact meaning. 'Did he just call me my love?' She tried not to react and smiled politely as Haldir's brothers walked up to them.
"Legolas, did you forget about hunting?" Rumil asked as he and Orophin approached.
"Was that today?" Legolas asked a bit embarrassed that he could forget his duties. He sprang to his feet, but looked down at Cel. "Lord Elrond is looking for you." He held out his hand and helped her to her feet. She walked a few paces, but stopped when she deemed she was far enough away for Haldir not to hear.
"I was worried about Haldir so I came to check on him," she whispered.
On the beach, Haldir smirked and called out, "I can still hear you," before lifting his flute and playing again, but the notes were lighter now than they had been, and Cel was glad for this.
Blushing slightly, she pulled Legolas further away, and then said, "I think he wants to talk to someone. I won't be long, and if I tire, I will go inside and rest. I promise," she said, remembering Elves did not lightly make oaths.
Legolas nodded and looked at Orophin and Rumil. "Let me retrieve my bow and quiver," he said, then turned to Cel. "I will return this evening. Please do not over exert yourself."
Cel nodded and walked with Legolas back to Haldir, who lowered his flute as they approached. "Cel wishes to remain on the beach a short while longer. Will you please escort her back to the healing room when she is tired, Haldir?"
"I would be honored," he answered. "When she is ready to go inside."
"Do not worry Legolas. I will be fine," Cel smiled. She watched them walk towards the house. "Are you alright Haldir? If you need to talk I am a pretty good listener." She paused. "I know you don't know me, but maybe it would be easier to confide in someone who did not know the two of you personally."
"Perhaps," he said, turning to face Cel. "I have held this is for so long, and from so many. I did not wish to be a burden on them."
"I doubt they would have thought that," Cel assured him. "Believe me when I tell you that talking about it helps. I know it does."
Sighing, he rolled his flute between his fingers as the surf brushed against the shore. "I thought I was learning to deal with the loss of Galádë but now that I know she lives the memories flood back into my mind."
"That's understandable, Haldir."
"I thought she was gone forever," he continued. "I tried to far speak with her when we realized she was lost and we were not able to connect. I could not feel her presence. That had never happened to us. I worried. I panicked. I mourned. I went through such great grief. And now, if all you say is true… I lost so much time... " his voice trailed off.
"Sometimes things happen for a reason. Perhaps the Valar have other plans? Maybe you both needed to learn to appreciate each other and what you had together?"
"It is not possible for her to return," he said sadly. "I have been told many times that I will never find her, no matter how long and far I search. My own mother has told me there is nothing I can do."
"Why not? We got here didn't we?" she said, almost annoyed. "Never say never. There is always hope."
"Do you really believe that?" he asked after a long pause.
"Yes, I do! I am here with elves I thought existed only in books. So, yes, Haldir, I really do believe anything is possible. I mean, don't you find it strange that we have arrived here in Valinor and just happen to know Galádë? I do not believe that is just coincidence. The Valar must have wanted you to know she is alive. A love so strong cannot die."
"I suppose," he answered. "I suppose, just knowing she is out there, somewhere, does bring me some small comfort."
"I promise you Haldir --- if there is a way to find Galádë and bring her back to you, Alatariel and I will find it," she said, placing her hand on his. "We can be very stubborn sometimes," she laughed. Then more seriously she added, "Galádë would not want you to give up hope."
Haldir nodded and considered her words. "Thank you Cel," he said, rising to his feet and extending his hand to her. "You should get back to bed for now or I fear Elrond and Legolas will blame me for your relapse," he laughed. "Legolas will not be pleased if you are not rested when he returns."
"Can I ask you something?" she asked while allowing him to help her rise.
"Of course you may. I will do my best to answer," he said, grabbing the blankets and leading Cel back to the house.
"Something weird happens when I am with Legolas," she began. "When we touch… it's strange. There is a connection, like we are two halves completing each other. It is almost as if I can hear his thoughts sometimes, feel what he is feeling. It is a little exciting, but I fear it as well."
Haldir smiled. "Does this feel right to you?"
"Yes, it does," Cel answered.
"Then do not fear what you feel," he said. "It may be a strong kinship, though it may be something more. Do not waste the time you have with him," he said, a little sadly. "If it is something more, if you believe perhaps he is the one, do not linger in telling him so. Trust me in this."
Galadriel stood waiting on the porch as Haldir and Cel approached the house. "Cel you must get some rest. I will see you to your room," she said taking her arm. "Haldir, your father and Elrond could use some help in the garden."
"Rest well, Cel," Haldir said, heading around back. "I enjoyed our talk." Then looking at his mother he said in Sindarin, "She sees almost as much as you do, Nana."
*~*~*~*~*~*
Alatariel let Galadriel help Cel get settled into bed before speaking. "Lady Galadriel, may I ask you something?"
Galadriel turned toward her, smiling warmly. "I already know the answers you seek," she said, sitting down on the chair between the beds before continuing. "The feelings you have when you are with the twins," she said to Alatariel, and then looking at Cel, added, "and that you experience with Legolas are a true blessing from the Valar." She gave them a moment to absorb what she had said.
"When you say blessing from the Valar…" prompted Alatariel, not wishing to assume.
"It is meant to be," Galadriel said simply.
"But my lady, how can I choose between the two?" Alatariel asked with obvious concern in her voice.
"There is no choice to be made. Your fate lies with both Elladan and Elrohir." She smiled. "They are very special, and unlike any other pair of twins. They share much more than a brotherly bond; for they share also share a soul. One fea, split between two minds and two bodies. You must be very strong to be chosen for two elves with such a strong bond. All of your patience will be tested as your children will inherit their parents' strength and strong will," she said teasingly.
"When you say children…" prompted Alatariel again, Galadriel laughed melodically.
"I see a great many things, with and without my mirror," she answered.
"Oh great!" Alatariel laughed.
Cel started to speak when Galadriel turned towards her. "Yes, you and Legolas are also meant to be together as one. Your connection is strong already. Thranduil will be pleased his son has found his mate at last."
Standing, she tucked both ladies in as a mother would tuck in her children. "Rest now. We will talk more later, when you are refreshed. Let your minds be at peace. Things are as they should be." Sleep overtook Cel and Alatariel as Galadriel blew out the candles and closed the door. "Welcome home."
*~*~*~*~*~*
Interlude: Somewhere in Wisconsin, or, You cannot go back.
You cannot go back.
Impatiently, she tapped her foot at the dryer. There it stood, unused, unmoving, and yet full of clothes. Someone else's clothes, obviously, or she would have been in the process of removing said clothing and putting the damp ones from the washer into the dryer.
Twice she opened the door to the dryer, stared in, and shut the door. Removing the clothes would have been quite easy to do, and she expected she could return hours later and still find them here. However, it was not proper etiquette to do so, so she cursed as she dumped the wet clothing into a large wicker basket and hauled it to a door leading to the basement of another section of apartments.
Meticulously picking the lint out of the trap that had not been cleaned, more cursing came when she found these dryers to be the ones without more than two settings. This changed to pouting when she reminded herself there was no one around to really hear her words of dissention, nor would anyone have cared.
Dumping the empty basket atop the dryer, she walked back to the basement she came from, only to discover her clothes washing nemesis had retrieved their laundry and that the dryer was free. "The Valar hate me," she grumbled to herself as she climbed the stairs.
She had actually been quite sure that the Valar hated her for some time. `At least the `70s were fun,' she thought to herself. `Revolution, rights of citizens… not to mention, John Adams and Thomas Jefferson were great conversationalists…' Even these fond memories of past times in such a fast changing environment did little to truly make her happy. She was still upset – and had a right to be. It was unfair that anyone should be sent back, and what was worse, sent back alone.
You cannot go back.
The words echoed in her head from the moment she had heard them as she watched the remains of her beautiful white ship sink beneath the waves. She didn't understand them at first, not until she realized that the island she had made it to the shore of was not Tol- Eressëa. Even then, she thought perhaps that she had come to some yet unexplored island of Aman, but as soon as she saw them, her heart sank.
Men. She was back in a world she had left she knew not when. She tried to reject the Valar's will she be here, but she was powerless to do so. Always going west, always going in circles. She hadn't given up, she reminded herself as she turned the water in the tub on. She was just regrouping, getting her bearings and coming up with a different course of action.
Shrugging off her clothes and tossing them on the floor, she stepped into the tub and pulled the curtain shut – not that she needed to be all that modest with Harley. He was sleeping on the toilet, his ginger tail hanging to the ground and twitching now and again as he dreamed.
"Silly cat," she remarked to herself, letting the water soothe her body, but not her spirit. It was here that she did the most thinking, or the most plotting, perhaps. Beneath the water that she made the most important decisions, when there was nothing to concentrate on except what was important. As always, the item at the top of the list was getting home.
"I know you greatly dislike me," she said, and though it may have seemed she spoke to herself, she in fact had quite an audience. "At least, I assume you must. Why else would you have left me to wander? But by now, have I not suffered enough? What act so grievous did I commit to be thrown from the lands undying? Tell me, so that I may repent!"
She listened, hoping to hear one of them answer her. But as always, the answer remained the same.
You cannot go back.
Falling to her knees, she bowed her head. "Then let me see him once more – I must have earned even that! Just for a moment, and not in my mind. Let him know I am here, that I did not drown in the seas of our homeland. Or…" Looking up at the beige ceiling, as if she could see them beyond the walls, she dared say, "Or bring him to me and let me live with him here."
Closing her eyes, she waited to hear if her plea was answered, but heard only the sound of water hitting the bathtub, and faint, in the back of her mind, a lone flute's sorrowful notes.