Okay, so this is very, very random. But anyway.....

Let's just suppose for a minute that Glorfindel, Legolas, Elrohir and Erestor are on a shopping trip for no reason whatsoever. (See! > *points* Random!)

Just out of interest, which aisle do you think which elf would go to and why? I.E: Glorfindel - Hair care. There's only so many washes that dye can last! LOL! *snerk*

Luv ~Forest

Hmmm...Glorfindel, Elrohir, Legolas, and Erestor...oh, the possibilities...

Elladan: If Elrohir's going, then I'm coming along, too! It's my responsibility to keep an eye on my little brother.

*Elrohir rolls his eyes and grabs a shopping cart.*

Glorfindel: Look, they have one of those food court cafes here! *Pulls Erestor away from the sales ads he was looking at and into the small food express line* Slurpies...pretzels with cheese...hotdogs...and pizza...

Zhie: *shouting to Glorfindel and Erestor* Catch up to us after you two hobbits eat, okay?

Haldir: *Pulling out another cart* If you're bringing all of these elves, I'm coming, too. You can't keep watch over all of these troublemakers by yourself.

Zhie: *Watching as Elladan hops up onto the front edge of the cart just before Elrohir races it down the aisle, causing more than one mortal to flee in fear.* Too true.

*Legolas watches the twins race their cart down the main aisle and looks at Haldir hopefully.*

Haldir: Not a chance.

Legolas: Please?

Haldir: No.

Legolas: I'll buy you a cookie. *He nods in the direction of the cafe.* One of the big chocolate chip ones.

*Haldir considers this for a moment, and pushes the cart down the aisle without answering*

Legolas: Spoilsport!

Zhie: And so the adventure begins.

MEANWHILE...

Elladan: Have you ever seen so many before?

Elrohir: They're beautiful. I want them all.

Elladan: Let's see...Chips, Ahoy! - that sounds like something Captain Jack would want to try - Oreos, Fig Newtons - we'll get an extra package of these for Melpomaen! - hey, what's going on over there?

*The twins push their cart, overflowing with boxes and bags of cookies, to a table at the end of the aisle. Behind mountains of perfectly stacked boxes are a half dozen super cute little girls in brown and white uniforms. The twins approach the table, forgetting the cart as they see a large stack of green boxes on the table.*

Elladan: It can't be...

Elrohir: I think it is...

Elladan: *Looking down at the smiling kids* What are you doing with all of these boxes?

Cute Kiddle Number One: We sell 'em to raise money for camping trips.

Cute Kiddle Number Two: I won all the swimming races at camp last year!

Elrohir: You mean...we could buy these...?

Cute Kiddle Number Three: Yesth you could, misthter. Three bucksth a boxth.

Elladan: El, we have died and gone to the West.

Elrohir: *Grabbing up an armful of boxes and hugging them to his chest* That isn't possible, El, but right now, I just don't care!

BACK AT THE EATERY...

Erestor: *Carefully looking over the advert while eating a super large softie pretzel without salt* Oh, look at this. They have those big huge body pillows you can toss on the floor and lounge on for a good price this week.

Glorfindel: *He swallows a mouthful of pizza and washes it down with a long drink of Mountain Dew* How often do you lounge that you'd need one?

Erestor: That's not the point, Fin. *Erestor shakes his pretzel menacingly at Glorfindel* The point is you can't find a better deal on these this side of the sea!

Glorfindel: *Finishing his soda and tossing the empty drink cup into the trash bin* Alright, linens, here we come!

AND NOW FOR SOMETHING COMPLETELY DIFFERENT:

Celeborn: I heard that there's a sale on flashlights this week.

Galadriel: I always say that laser lights are less practical than flashlights.

DOWN THE SPORTING GOODS AISLE:

Zhie: What are you two doing? Put that back, Legolas, you look ridiculous. *Zhie grabs the surfboard Legolas has been holding and puts it back on the shelf.* Surfing elves. Ridiculous. *She turns to look at Haldir and her eyes bulge when she sees all of the stuff in the cart.* What is all this?

Haldir: *Looks down into the cart with a serious expression.* Fishing tackle, bait box, beef jerkey, fishing line-

Zhie: Yes, I know what it is.

Haldir: *Looking confused* Then why do you always ask me?

Zhie: I meant why is it in the cart.

Haldir: Then you should ask 'why is it in the cart'.

*There is a long pause*

Zhie: *sighs* Why is it in the cart, Halli?

Haldir: Because it's on sale.

Zhie: *rolling her eyes* You don't even own a fishing pole.

Haldir: *Contemplates this as he looks over the stuff in the cart* I think those were on sale, too. *Walks off to get one*

*Legolas tries to toss a box of something into the cart without anyone noticing. Zhie narrows her eyes and pulls the box out of the cart.*

Zhie: A box of 72 golf balls?

Legolas: *Grabbing them and pointing out the color* Neon green golf balls. Is that cool or what?

Zhie: *Taking two steps away from Legolas* Sometimes, you scare me.

*Legolas tossed his balls into the cart and shrugs*

Haldir: Here we are. *Puts his rod into the cart* Ready to go.

Zhie: *Glancing at the audience* Silly on so many levels, isn't it, folks? *Looking back at the elves* Yes, let's - where have you two been?

*The twins approach, grinning and each carrying two bags filled with boxes of cookies*

Elladan: We made some friends...

Elrohir: ...and bought some cookies.

Haldir: *Reaching for one of the bags* Hey, are those-

Elladan: *Jumping away* Mine!

Elrohir: *Looking annoyed* You mean 'ours'.

Elladan: Uh...right. I meant 'ours'. It just came out 'mine'.

Zhie: Do we know where Glorfindel and Erestor went off to?

*Everyone shrugs*

IN THE BEDDING SECTION...

Erestor: *Snuggling a fluffy comforter* I don't care if she did do something illegal, I still love Martha.

*Glorfindel nods as he rubs his cheek against a big cushy pillow*

Will the rest of the group find out where Glorfindel and Erestor are hiding?  Will K-Mart kick the Elves out for goofing around in the store?  Will Elrohir and Elladan share their cookies with anyone else?  Well, probably not, so I'm going to go and grab a few boxes of my own...and that's all I have time for...and all my bank account can afford...these elves can be expensive! Until next time...Tune in later, dear readers, for the continuation of..."All's Fair in Love and War"